During the epidemic, many people experienced home quarantine, and the amount of time they spent alone increased dramatically, leaving many of them suffocating. Some people jokingly said that they feel like they can’t “talk” anymore, and it seems that some people really feel that their ability and desire to socialize has become weaker. But there are also people who enjoy being alone. ……

What does being alone mean to a person? Does being alone for long periods of time affect one’s ability to socialize?

The meaning of solitude varies from person to person

What some people see as being alone can be a symbol of loneliness, as personality psychologist Berg describes it: being alone is in the nature of introverts, and may be a way for people with social fears to avoid social contact and reduce anxiety, or it may be an unintentional choice brought on by a social disorder.

Others believe that solitude is necessary for introspection, which is more in line with American psychologist Maslow’s alternative interpretation of solitude. He believed that solitude could reflect the trajectory of a person’s growth and help the person in his or her development.

Therefore, some scholars in China have given a more neutral definition to the behavior of solitude: solitude is an internal personality trait, it is an individual in a state of clear consciousness, in a state of no information and emotional exchange with others. And on the basis of this formulation, the reasons and motives behind solitude are divided into four different types:

01 Positive solitude

For some people, being alone is not a forced decision, but an active choice. Even if they have good interpersonal relationships in their daily lives, they spend some time with themselves, have conversations with themselves, and in this way think about their personal life, work, or emotions. Simply put, such people are not alone, and being alone is their way of improving themselves.

02 Social Avoidance

In contrast to people who are actively alone, people who are truly “socially fearful” or “socially anxious” choose to be alone in order to avoid social situations and to minimize their interactions with people. For them, being alone greatly reduces the anxiety and panic associated with socializing. Obviously, being alone is not an active choice, but a passive decision brought about by social avoidance.

03 Antisocial

In the eyes of most people, isolation is probably more “serious” than social avoidance. While many people who are “socially fearful” can gradually improve with some positive exercises, withdrawnness is more of a personality trait or psychological quality, and because of this, it is difficult for withdrawn people to maintain normal relationships with other people.

04 Loneliness

As for loneliness, it is more of a subjective feeling. Loneliness is usually an unhappy experience and the reason behind this is that socialization brings less than expected feelings. Therefore, for lonely people, being alone isn’t happy and doesn’t bring positive help, but bad socialization experiences make them have to deal with solitude and loneliness.

From a bystander’s point of view, positive solitude may be the only way in which solitude behavior can have a positive, positive effect. In a survey of the Solitary Behavior Scale conducted with both normal and mentally ill populations, it was also found that the normal population scored significantly higher than the patient group on positive solitude, while the opposite was true for isolation-related scores. For people with both types of personality traits, being alone implies an active choice on their part. But on the contrary, loneliness or social avoidance is usually a negative feeling of not having a choice.

How does being alone affect social skills?

It’s easy to see that social skills and experiences are one of the major causes of solitary behavior, especially for lonely or socially avoidant types. But on the flip side, isn’t it possible that prolonged periods of being alone can also affect a person’s social skills?

If a person is alone for a long period of time, the biggest difference from a socializing scenario may be the fact that they can’t see other people or hear voices, which are based on the person’s senses. The sense of hearing, in particular, may be affected by the many aspects of being alone and alter one’s socialization.

Studies at the cellular level have shown that being alone causes changes in the response properties of auditory neurons in animals. Using songbirds, or birds that crow, as subjects, some researchers have found that neurons in birds that live in flocks perceive sound more accurately and selectively filter out some noise compared to birds that live in isolation. Functional magnetic resonance imaging of the brains of the birds involved in the experiment also showed that the more socially enriched birds had a stronger specific stimulus for sound information.

However, the above studies have mainly focused on songbirds, while studies on mammals, including humans, have focused on other aspects. In studies using mice, it was found that social isolation measures such as solitary confinement can affect the interaction between serotonin and the auditory system. And by comparing magnetic resonance imaging results of nine polar explorers before and after 14 months at an Antarctic research station, the researchers found that their brains were smaller, especially in the “C-shaped region” that is primarily involved in the formation of new memories-the “dentate hippocampus”-that is, the “C-shaped region” of the hippocampus. “The dentate gyrus of the hippocampus shrank by an average of about 7 percent.

In addition to these possible physical effects, the psychological effects of being alone may be even more significant in terms of changing one’s social habits and abilities. Prolonged periods of solitude may lead to feelings of “loneliness”, which may imply a decrease in overall cognitive ability; increased perceptions of negative and depressive emotions, increased sensitivity to social threats, self-protective and paradoxical thinking may lead to a greater tendency to avoid social activities.

Returning to the topic at the beginning, because of the new coronavirus, people’s travel and activities are sometimes restricted, which invariably increases the amount of time that many people spend alone, and how to positively treat and utilize this time alone can be a challenge. The good news is that with the advancement of the Internet and various means of audio and video communication, people in solitude are now able to socialize online.

However, if you were born with a preference for solitude, or if you feel extremely lonely and miserable due to extended periods of solitude, be sure to seek some counseling or medical advice.

Get out more and socialize with people, and you’ll feel better about the world.